A Pressure: More Than Shaadi Ka Pressure

Guess what? I am back with another write-up. Well, it’s been so long since my writing here. However, you guys might have questions about my existence. But, well, I could not make myself appear here after Shaadi Ka Pressure After 28 - blog.

Yes, after going through several taunts and facing many illogical questions from the people, I have finally lived that phase which had given me more pressure than the Shaadi ka pressure. Here’s a fictional story which I would like to tell. Emphasizing on - Fictional. Because, I know, after reading this story, I might get several phone calls or messages from known or relatives, stating that, “Dekha Jigar, maine tumhe bola thaa na, tumhara yahi sab hai!”

Let’s hear then!

After 28 or 29 years on the earth, I was asked to get married. After making up my mind and becoming more stable in my life, I finally agreed to get married. Hence, I asked my parents to find a suitable girl for me. I started hunting girls on several matrimonial websites. While registering myself on the matrimonial apps, I have realized that these apps are platforms where you have to endorse yourself. Yes, exactly! It’s a place like Laal Darwaza or Mangal Bazar, where you have to market yourself with good product pictures.

When I land on the app, I feel like I am some Patanjali product. I would have to be kind and polite to everyone. Moreover, I would have to show that I am inclined towards Indian culture and follow the roots of Hinduism completely. In a nutshell, I would have to impress consumers or other candidates with higher qualifications and annual incomes. In fact, this is the first criteria that would allow the opponent to select whether we are capable of being swiped right or wrong. You know, it’s like selecting a garment at Laal Darwaza. If a merchant shows you some attractive garments, then you just take interest in buying it. But before that, you ask him to show some similar patterns. Yes, this is what happens when you are opting for an arranged marriage.

If a candidate gets attracted and swipes you right, then you should not be happy. Hold on, Sirji! You just have cleared the first stage. We have several phases to go. She has just shown some interest in you from your pictures and the written bio - which is either pasted from somewhere else or written by your friend. So, now you have chosen one garment from the merchant. But you have just selected, not purchased yet! So, now what you will do is - you will ask for more patterns to choose from. And if you like some of the other new patterns, then you will add them to your cart. After fetching three or four patterns of the garment, the first one you have selected will be kept on hold. Gggrr!!

Everyone loses their patience when one is kept on hold for a long time! Well, even, this much time doesn’t even get consumed by the telephone operator from BSNL.

Chalo, finally, after passing through several selections and endorsing myself, finally, I manage to find a suitable candidate from the other caste. She’s from the same state which I happen to live and work for the last four years. However, due to the pandemic, my parents have come to stay with me so that I could not face any problems and eat homemade hygienic food. Since my family is with me, I want to connect the dots of my life very soon. Hence, our both families (mine and that girl’s) start having a discussion and reach a conclusion soon.

In a few days, my engagement takes place. From product marketing to deployment, this procedure occurs so quickly that I don’t even believe that I am going to release the pressure which people have given me. I am relieved.

I break the official news to everyone that now, I am officially engaged. So, now the story starts from here.

However, my relatives came to know about my engagement. Furthermore, they inquire about the girl - what’s doing, what’s her name, where’s she from. Well, these are completely genuine and untestable questions. But, once they know details of the girl’s whereabouts, caste, and geography, they tighten their lips and raise eyebrows and murmur with “Hmmm!! Achcha…”

Their reactions are like I had booked all the slots for vaccination and they could not get it.

Do you know what’s the typical Indian mentality? They don’t resist creating clouds of their own thoughts. They don’t hold themselves back by having gossip or taking things to the level. So after hearing about the girl's caste, they utter “Love hi thaa toh pehle bata deta na hume! Hume toh koi problem nahi hai”

“Haa. I know, your daughter is having an affair for the last two years, and still, you are not convinced of it”. This statement bangs in my head and however, I manage to give them a sly smile.

Another question I have to encounter is, “Haa, achcha, isiliye tum waha chhar saal se reh rahe ho na!!”

“Arey, bhai! If you are willing to pay me what I am getting from the existing job, then I am ready to leave that city. But for the sake of yourself, don’t become the Kejriwal of politics who always gets ignored and trolled.”

“Bahut chhupa rustam nikla haah tu! Love marriage haah? Sahi hai.” With a flirtatious smile, one of my friends asks me.

My mind always juggles between these thoughts. But unfortunately, those don’t come out of my mouth.

With every passing day of my betrothal, I have to deal with various types of statements and questions.

However, now I am feeling pressured more than ever before. It is completely uncertain for our family to finalize the date of the wedding due to the uncertain scenario of the pandemic. And people have one more question to ask, “Beta, ab toh tera vyaah bhi ho gaya hai, shaadi kab kar rahe ho.”

Trust me, it’s not easy to tackle these questions on a daily basis.

When I go out and if I face someone known or relatives, then they congratulate me with a nice gesture and say, “I did give a call to your father at landline. But nobody was picking it up.”

With a big smile on my face and in an affirmative voice, I answered, “Actually, my parents had come down to stay with me. So there was nobody at home to pick up the call.”

But this Indian mentality doesn't end with one short conversation.

They ask me, “Ohh!! Isiliye tumhare parents tumhare saath aaye the to fix your engagement with your loved one.”

I try to keep myself calm and gulp the frustration. I take a long breath before I try to explain them.

“Nahi. That was a mere coincidence. Things fell into their way and thus, dots were connected eventually.” 

“Ohh! Aisa? I don’t think so.” They come up with again the stupid question as if they were the creator of whole this event.

“So, where are you heading towards?” I asked a question with politeness.

“Going for a haircut. To fix my hair. It has become messy, you know!” He answered me by swirling his hair in the air and showing hair to me.

One day, my mother told me that this uncle wears a wig. Well, thanks to my good memory power which came while having a conversation with the same uncle now.

“Ohh! Aisa? I don’t think so.” With a puppy face and winking at him, I replied back.

Sometimes, it’s necessary to give a taste of their own medicine.

In India, elders still live in the orthodox mentality and don’t try to walk along with the time. With every passing year of their own existence on the earth, they become more rigid. They don’t become practical and remain in their old-cultured thoughts. Therefore, they forget to understand the latest scenario and the next generation’s blood. They are keener to know what’s cooking in their neighborhood. They always keep their eyes open to what Sharmaji ka beta eats in their meal and how they manage to eat biryani frequently. But here, they forget that their own so-called Khichdi gets sticky if you can’t control your own cooker.

In nutshell, irrespective of any situation - be it engagement period, marriage time, or post-wedding days, people will always find some questions to ask. There will not be any situation in life, where people won’t come across your path. So, you have to be ready and make yourself calm irrespective of your status. If you are single that doesn’t mean you are unmarried, if you are married that doesn’t mean you are happy as well. The phase of your life you choose should be your own choice. It should not be chosen by seeing what others are doing or what we are being forced to do. Happiness is all about your mindset. If you peep into other’s life, they will only show you what they wanted to show. So, without peeping into their window, we should indulge in our inner self and cherish what we’re getting. Rather than taking pressure on Shaadi, we must put an end to it.

Shaadi Ka Pressure After 28

A few days back I came across a girl who was around 32 years old. She was looking damn happy. I was having a sip of chai while sitting besides her and noticed everything she was doing. She seemed to be on the seventh clouds and could not hold her excitement with whoever she was talking over the call. I was trying to step into her shoes and understand the reason behind her happiness and excitement.

After a few minutes, when she hung up the phone, I was staring at her. I could not hold myself and my self tried to ask her for the reason of excitement. With a sip of tea, I leaned towards her and asked, “Is this a tea-seller giving a free membership to you to have a chai without any cost?”

She got a surprised look. She could not understand what’s been happening. Her eyes froze on me for two minutes and said “Huhh! Excuse Me.”

Well, in my mind, I got a thought for a while that is she too dumb or trying to pretend that questions were not for me.

In a very gentle manner and to the point I asked simply, “What’s the reason behind this excitement? Sitting on a public place and with more than twenty people, you are the only one who jumped out of the joy and grabbed attention of many guys.”

She was taken back and could not understand what’s happening. Plenty of thoughts were running in her mind. Her eyes were on fire and excited at the same time. And she replied, “What has this to do with my excitement to you?”

I said calmly “Well, you must be around 30 and at the recent time, I’ve seen nobody who is so much happy and excited as much you.”

“Either you’re not from India or trying to wear a mask of a person which you are not.” I added.

Hearing this statement from me, she actually could not get these things and started avoiding me. I became a nonexistent element for her in no time. She focused herself on the phone and started messaging to her friend. I tried to peep into her cellphone. She was actually WhatsApping to her friend saying “Anisha, finally, the moment has arrived. I know it’s not too late, but let me break the ice now.”

After two minutes, Anisha came online and replied to her, “What are you talking about? And what type of moment you are waiting for?”

Just like her friend - Anisha, I was also confused and had no idea what was she talking about. Obviously, why would I have an idea as I just met her 10 minutes back and I know nothing about her. I tried to gather thoughts and imagined the matter what are the things that should make her happy.

“Got her America Visa” - Maybe.

“Landed up with her dream job?” - Actually no.

“Her family might have agreed to let her go for a solo trip?” - Ffiiisshhhh…

“Night out?” - hmmmmm!!

Cut the crap. I told myself and reminded not to get into the shoes of ‘Kartik Calling Kartik’. Better I should ask her directly.

“No! That’s not a good idea.” I murmured”. Then I tried to look into her cell-phone.

She was typing, “Ani, you won’t believe, but, I am getting married.”

“What? I mean wow!” I said to myself.

“Congratulations!” Finally, I broke the wall of silence and came forward to her.

“Sorry? Excuse me!” She narrowed her eyes and said. She got a surprised look and her forehead had many question marks which could be answered soon, hope so.

Meanwhile, Sanju - a Chai boy came and said ‘Bhayaji, chai.”

Another cup of tea, I had taken and looked at him I said, “Ek Chai Madamji ko bhi de do. Unki Shaadi jo fix hui hai.”

Sanju put another cup of tea on the table which was lying in between us and left the place.

Immediately I looked at her and I was sure, I became a victim of a crime travelling on the train without a ticket. All I could see was too much irritation, anger and curiosity of how-the-hell-a-stranger-would-be-knowing-I-am-getting-married.

She gave me a cringed look and asked, “How the hell do you come to know that I am getting married?”

A complete expected statement I was expecting from her. So, I was prepared and had my answers ready in my mind.

“well, the question is not how I came to know. But the matter is that congratulations. Now you’ve officially surpassed the criteria of ‘Beta Shaadi Kab Karoge!!!’ and become a member of ‘Ab Bacche Paida Kar Lo!!!’. Because, what I feel is if you’re living humans in India and probably crossed the age barrier of 28 - which is set by society, but not Modiji, then you are being called an unmarried guy. But not a happily single person. Each and every day you’re surviving and struggling under the pressure and tag of ‘unmarried’.

Well, this could be elaborated later on. Now, let’s focus on her.

To take me out of my imaginary world, she pinched me and said “Helllo!”

I came back to the earth and said, “Well, the message you write is neither secret anymore nor made it 

to the privacy stage.”

“Not from Mark, not from government. Not from me.” I added.

I tried to play on front-foot smartly and made her realise that I am also a tech-gig and know the latest updates and new in the tech world. I actually tried to prove to her that I am a tech-person, holding a master degree.

Again ignoring all the part of mine, she said, “Thank you, anyway!”

Nowadays, these girls, I tell you. They are ignoring us like we always ignore the message of Windows Activation for the Windows update. They ignore us like we ignore Rahul Gandhi’s agenda and speech during the election. They ignore us like politicians ignore the promises and manifesto. They ignore us like we ignore Eliachi in Biryani. They ignore us like Modiji ignoring Kejriwali’s statement.

They have subtle art of avoiding people even if they are their friends. They always pretend to like - ‘there’s no one around me’, then ‘why would I talk to them if they’re willing to talk to me’. well, I, again, tried to build a conversation with her and asked, “Well, is it love marriage or arrange one?”

Again, my question made her furious, but, still, she replied, “Obviously, love one.”

I murmured, “Obviously?”

What does that mean? I mean why she has used ‘obviously’ word as if I know with whom she’s getting married. I did not understand her statement and tried to avoid that nine-letter word from my mind.

In a very enthusiastic way, I said, “Wow! That’s really great. Lucky girl. Haah!”

She just gave me a quirky smile and said nothing. Again, she drowned into the world of mobile.

“So, since how long you are committed?” I finally gave up on being silent and asked.

With a cunning smile, she replied, “For the last 30 years.”

I nodded and then realised her answer - last 30 years.

I mean what? Seriously? Are you a psychopath or what? Are you in a conscious state of mind?

I wanted to shake her from the shoulder and yell and ask these questions. But it was just a mere dream for me. With a big question on my face, I asked, “What?”

In a very simple way she replied, “Yes!”

“Yes, I am getting married to myself.” She added and winked at me.

“What’s the reason that has led you to get married to yourself?”

Without thinking too much and having another question, I asked this one directly.

The excitement and happiness, she has had, has been vanished when I asked this question. She got a wrinkle on her face while facing this question.

“Pressure. Family pressure.” she said.

She added ‘family’ word here. and stopped herself from getting into the emotional trauma.

I realized many things were going on in my mind. Various thoughts were born and burst by hearing the word ‘pressure’.

What I feel is the only thing worse than getting married is getting married for the wrong reason under pressure.

I wasn’t aware of how to react to her statement - whether to laugh or cry. It really seems surreal that we’re in 2020, but parents, relatives, society and that chaar-log have still not stopped putting pressure on us to get married at the ‘right’ age.

At the recent time, some families have accepted and gave freedom to their children to ‘fall in love’ - as per their choice. It means they’re already certified to live life like ‘Jaa Simran Jaa, Jee Le Apni Zindagi’. But if poor Simran is not able to find love, she has to agree to sit with parents every weekend to sift suitable Sharmaji ka ladka or Varmaji ka beta on matrimonial site. As per their either scientific theory or mathematics logic, the right age must not pass, you see. Because it will be difficult for both to find rishtas and well-love. By having a formal conversation with parents, colleagues and other people, I have come to the conclusion and it's a hundred percent right - the only thing worse than getting married is getting married for the wrong reason, under pressure.

Since the wedding season is upon us, the peer pressure is actually here. Whenever your friend is getting married, the pressure of your Shaadi multiplies by a million in your head. Waha tak thaa toh thik hai. Lekin ab saare dosto ke bachche bhi aa gaye. Bas karo ab! Aur kitna pressure daaloge hum par.

The more you hurry you are in to get the tag of ‘committed’ or ‘married’, the more you will ward off the right kind of people. Any kind of decision of getting married scare or simply put people off. Why would you want to take a quick decision about getting married? Because there is the pressure at your home. It’s a question of their life, too, equally. Isn’t it?

Even, all this old saying that you are too old to find a suitable to find a guy. There used to be a time a few decades back when a girl or guy got married when they would turn 18 or 20. Now, that mindset has gone from at least the educated middle class and so should be the stress. Of course, their point was to get settle down biologically. If the choice is between marrying at the ‘right age’ and to go for the later to gain short-term peace of mind. Let me slap you right now. Because, life will, later.

Single doesn’t always mean sad, just as a relationship doesn’t always mean happy. you will not understand this gyaan because all you can see happy committed faces on Instagram or Facebook. But, just remember that when these couples are done flaunting their ‘committed’ status, all they see around them are happy singles. That’s the irony of the human mind. Your happiness, whether you’re being called Mrs or Miss, will only come from your own thoughts. If you have consciously chosen to be happy, the presence or absence of girlfriend or boyfriend can only add value to it. It can’t be the pioneer of your state-of-mind. After all, you are the ruler and rider of your own life. One wrong choice under pressure can take you to the destruction. Nobody can influence you to get married. The voice about the right time and the right person has to come from within you. Whether it’s getting into a hurried relationship to avoid arrange relationship or saying yes to arrange marriage to avoid pressure because your friends or family want you to get settled down. It’s only your life and you have to suffer. And your partner’s, too. I am sure, no relatives will then carry the responsibility of pushing you into the state of unhappiness. And even if they did for namesake, the things would be too late then. So, take your time before you walk ahead. Staying single is not the end of life. It’s bliss actually. It’s really another way of living a beautiful life if you are in love with yourself. Anyway, whether your status is married or single or committed, there will be people on this planet who will envy you, and some who will thank God they are not in your place.

Well, that’s just how it is. It’s the phase of every Indian boy or girl who’s been into their 26 to 30’s age.

Welcome to the world of ‘Unmarried’ instead of ‘Single’ anymore.

Is India Changing? – India’s Battle For Love

(Photo Courtesy: Google)

Right now the whole universe along with India is mesmerized with the happiness & pride and painted in the colour of Love. Everyone is now running by taking the pride of scraping section 377 by the Supreme Court in the past days. Social media and newspapers are filled with conversations and reports about Section 377. Everyone looks happy, is filled with pride and is feeling Gay suddenly. But before dancing on any song, we should know its beat, so that becomes easy for us to shake our legs according to the song beat.

(Photo Courtesy: Youtube)

History has been made and I guess it’s not an illegal or criminal offense to be Gay in India anymore.

There has been a huge uproar throughout the country with people supporting the striking down of section 377 of the Indian Penal Code, 1860 (IPC). When people talk about section 377 of the Indian Penal Code, people generally think it just criminalises homosexuality (sexual attraction to the people belonging to the same sex) and violates the rights of gay people.

This is the section against homosexuality. Chapter XVI, Section 377 of the Indian Penal Code 1860, criminalises sexual activities "against the order of nature", arguably including homosexual sexual activities. This is also known as unnatural offences.

What does the law say?

Section 377 of the Indian Penal code makes carnal intercourse, or any non-procreative sexual act between a man and a woman illegal, punishable with up to 10 years in jail and/or a fine.

Though it doesn't apply only to homosexuals, it is widely perceived as the anti-gay sex law. It only penalises carnal intercourse against the order of nature. This covers homosexuals and heterosexuals alike.

So until now, you must have some basic and rough idea what Section 377 is about, and why everyone is painting their happiness by expressing gratitude and love!

But here is the main question that has been raised. Is really India changing?

Many people must agree that Yes, finally the Son has risen in India after a long wait and a historic judgement touches millions of lives. We’ve been discriminated against for ages. And this is the real Independence Day for the Queer citizen of this country. The whole country is celebrating and rejoicing in that celebration of the verdict against Section 377 which criminalised homosexuality.

Yes, this is the one bright part which shows that finally, India is stepping into the shoes of modern culture which makes India brighter and shiner. But what about the other side of the coin? India is changing. But what about the society? Is society changing? Has society accepted the way of living of LGBT community? Are they still struggling to face the challenges and consequences in India while living with normal people like us?

(Photo Source: Hindustan Times)

It’s not only about LGBT community, but also about the Love of a human being for other humans. LGBT plays a vital role in it since it took many years to understand the Supreme Court and its judiciary that falling in love and having a sex with the same gender is not criminal activity now. But here, we fail to understand that the society or the people who you are living with are not ready to accept the fact and reality check of falling in love with the same gender, holding hand of Muslim girl, sharing your soul and life with your spouse who is way older/younger than you, being the part of family who is on a way to his/her second life (marriage), accepting his/her kids. Thus, transgender is still considered as a taboo in India.

We’re still living in that country, where parents are ashamed of calling their son or daughter gay or lesbian or falling in love with other castes. It’s struggle for them and the constant feeling that their world could come to end at any moment. Society has progressed, but many members of our community hold onto self-hate and shame from an earlier era, with sometimes fatal consequences.

When people go against these rules made by society, they face some serious consequences and they have to give up on their love life ultimately. When it comes to acceptance between different castes and communities and same the genders then it is like a taboo for most of the people. But it is believed by various social reformers that in order to remove this barrier of caste and religion, it is very much necessary that inter-caste love, homosexual, bisexual, transgender love must take place. Love is regarded not only as a social institution in India but also as a sacrament.

Somewhere I hear the image of this conversation happening in society.

"You must be so proud. You have such a perfect son."

Dad smiling wide. Mom smiling wide.

They are calling me perfect. Why do I feel guilty then? Like I am hiding a dirty secret inside?

Let's face it - our society needs a massive makeover. Today, homosexuality and queer identities may be acceptable to more Indian youths than ever before, but within the boundaries of family, home and school, acceptance of their sexuality and freedom to openly express their gender choices still remain a constant struggle for LGBT community.

In a society, bound by a rigid mind set of social and cultural norms that dictate the terms and conditions of education, career, and marriage, the lack of family support, the intolerance of society and their disrespect can prove to be a big blow to the mental and physical health of LGBT people. A queer person has multiple struggles in all aspects of life. The society and family can make these people’s lives much easier if they don’t add to these struggles. The fundamental problem is that society has a hard time accepting the people as sexual beings. So, any talk of sexuality and sexual or gender identity is foiled and wrapped in shame. This is where the guilt and confusion begins. If people ask uneasy questions, most people hush and silence them. The family needs to learn to listen and let their children open up about difficult issues.

If someone has to live while hiding integral aspects of themselves, then one is as good as dead and nobody talks about the dead people. Now India has legalised same sex marriage because we understand the need of having the freedom to love and the freedom to marry whoever you want. Everyone has the right to marriage since marriage is all about love and not gender or caste. We should be allowed the freedom to choose our life partners. For how long will this chaos go on? When will society take a step to finish off these evils? This social evil has destroyed many lives and unfortunately, it still continues. Today these people are unable to live a normal life, just because they chose to marry for love, outside their caste or same gender.

We have to come closer to bridging the gap between reality and a truly inclusive society. We will consider this country to be free when society no longer differentiates in its treatment of people who may be lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or straight.

Yes, India is changing, but somehow society has to come out of their narrow shell and accept the definition of Love, be it in any form.

Don’t ever be afraid to show off your true colours.

Somehow we’ve won the battle but not war.

This video indeed captures the feeling that Love is!

(Video: Youtube)

“I am the sky and you are the earth. I am the giver of energy and you are the receiver. I am the mind and you are the word. I am music and you are the song. You and I follow each other.”

Nirbhaya, Asifa, Unnao, Who next?

RAPE!! Hasn’t it become a synonym of sex nowadays? I guess, Yes. Previously when we used to hear or utter this word, our entire body used to get shaken. But it has become a common word to hear from numerous people. The horrific rapes in India are now so common that every other day there is a Nirbhaya case. To me, in any case, no rape is less gruesome than another.

The entire nation wakes up with news that a young girl has been kidnapped and then brutally assaulted by older men. What? She’s just an eight year girl. Be shameful on what you did.

In most cases of rape in India, especially the recent cases that have shocked the nation once again, rape is not an act of lust but used as a tool to show power or take revenge, in these cases it is so difficult and almost unfair to not talk about politics.

Our main problem is that we remain silent in real life, but show our feminism on social media which is completely inappropriate way to condemn to the attackers. So kindly keep your social media feminism in your pocket and try to give her respect in her real life.

But when the matter comes to politicians or celebrities who are attackers or involved with these activities, then justice becomes blind and the whole country come together to stand by with them in real life.  We really don’t care your political compulsion, the ideology of your party, your attachment to a religion. If you don’t crack down hard and do justice to our child, you don’t deserve to be an Indian leader.

We have cases after cases, headlines after headlines but where’s the justice? What do we have to show for, where have we punished the rapists? Where are all those politicians and their connections who raped – why aren’t they rotting in jail?

In India, you are inviting yourself to be raped when you choose to wear skirts, jeans or eat biriyani. Here, you are raped for going to bars to drink and have a good time there. You will be raped because a politician or celebrity or his son has set his eyes on you and wants you to satisfy his hunger. And you can also be raped and murdered for falling in love outside your community. In India, you can be raped because you have happened to be an innocent child.

It’s really ok to make law and orders and policies just for sake. But where the hell are those policies, law and orders? Where’s the justice now? We all have been talking about real women safety and Beti Bachao. But where have all these propagandas gone?

Rape is not a problem in India. It’s an epidemic. It’s not being propagated by those who are part of this cruel act but also by those who remain to choose silent and not to speak on it. It’s just not a crime, but has become a cruel culture.

Turning 30? Oh God!

India is a country where your house is always been under surveillance by your neighbour or some Sharmaji ka ghar. Here, you get more tantrums or taane than the actual Carmel you find in five star. Sometime, I feel like I am being kidnapped by my own parents because they always find the way out to compare us with neighbour, Sharmaji ka Beta.

Source: Scoopwhoop

“Tuje pata he woh panchvi galli me jo Sharmaji rehte he na, uske bête ki shaadi ko teen saal ho gaye aur apne liye naya ghar bhi le liya.”

“Maa, Woh Hawas ke pujari ne naya ghar isiliye liya ke naye ghar me jaaye toh uska kuch khada ho sake!!! Warna 3BHK me 10 aadami ke sath rehne wala banda kaha se apni gufa tak pahochega?” I wanted to speak loudly but just murmured with myself.

Sharmaji ka beta is idol to them, according to every parent. But we only know, how many time he has been caught by police for making out with girl in public.

Infact, every house has the same story when the girl/boy turns out to be 26/27.

Beta shaadi kab kar rahe ho?

Are you really serious? Dude, don’t we have another priority or some work to do in life apart from getting f**ked in the day by boss and release those frustrations by f**king at night?

We just wish to evaporate from the situation and drown into the cup of water.

As far as these statements come from elders or relatives, are somewhat tolerable. But, when the friend who has just found his perfect match (according to him) without acknowledging him in prior, and his family had set up a trap for him for making it yes at one go, gives the advice for getting married. I speak, “Pehle toh bada sher ban ke ghoom raha thaa na, ab toh ghar wale hi khud iss sher ke shikari nikle toh pinjre me beth kar bhigi billi ban gaya.”

Actually now I get the real answer from a family.

Our mom is like Mother India. She can’t even see our real hard work as the society has already set up the things naturally.

Beta kab tak apne haath ki lakiro ko ghista rahega?

It seems like all the peeps on the earth have done doctorate degree on imposing their thoughts and advices on the bachelor guys.

Khud toh apni haath lauri me akele service nai kar paaye, isiliye dusre ko rakh liya kaam pe oiling ke liye.

Whenever you go to your friend’s place and in case if his mother welcomes you, then definitely she does it with a question instead of water, “Beta, kab tak akele ghumte rahego? Ab toh gaadi bhi aa gayi, laadi kab laa raha hai tu?”

“Yes, auntyji. Jab woh aapki cousin ki beti haa bol de tab.” I always wish to hit her with this answer. 

But damn, whenever I see my friend, I feel pity for being her kid.

But the day comes when you finally attend your friend’s wedding. The people have always been haunting you with their machine guns to fire you with their idiotic questions.

Somehow we save our self by excusing and diverting mind in food and checking out hot chicks. But for sure, we never get saved when the moment comes of taking a group picture of friends on the stage. But, once we step out from the stage, then there’s no chance of running away from groom’s parents. Finally, we get caught.

Oh shit! We can never get out of this situation now.

“Beta, ab toh tumhare friend circle me sirf tum akele hi baaki ho, kab kar rahe ho shaadi?”

“Haanji auntyji, yeh chai pi ke me ghar hi jaa raha hu. Raaste me koi milti he toh bas sidha isi mandap me lekar aata hu.” I wish I could hold her tightly from shoulder and scream in her ears like she would never dare to hear her own silent fart.

Those 4 to 5 years are so creepy that even any vendor comes to sell out the things in your society, you feel abhi yeh bolega, beta aaj kal toh dhaniya aur mirchi ki bhi Jodi he. Leikn teri Jodi kaha he?

Source: Google

Until we reach 30, we desperately lose our patience and invite everyone to say Aao bhai, maine meri khulli hi rakhi he. Maar lo jitni aapko marni ho. Aapki marzi.

But let me tell you, marriage is not only the priority which is left in the world. It’s a myth that has been carried since ages, that if you don’t get married by the age of 26, then you will not get enough choices of candidates.

Yeh wahi log bolte he jinke pas shaadi ke alawa aur kuch kaam nai he!!!

Bhai, tum log woh ho jisne kutte ki doom pe apna pair rakha he. Pata he woh kaatne hi waala he.

We’re just more cautious ke abhi yeh hamara time nai he ki hum gale me patta bandh ke ghume. 

That’s all.